A Closed Mouth Gathers No Foot

Just recently I was interviewed on the radio regarding the writing of my romance novel. I was nervous. The only other time I had been on the radio is when I use to call radio stations with a British accent requesting to hear Beatles songs. Yeah, I was stupid enough to say I was from Liverpool and attempted to pull off a horrible souse English accent. Well, at least they found me entertaining, they put me on air for God sakes!

Anyway, I've called into the pod cast station and Kat Johnson comes on and introduces herself to me. In the background is this automated woman counting down the minutes we have left. My heart is racing.

I'm asked if I have a segment to read. I swallow hard and say yes. And then we're on.

I laughed through the entire interview! My God, this is serious business and I'm cracking jokes. She asks a question, none of which I can remember now and I laugh and answer, then laugh again. I learned two things about myself during the interview. One, I don't listen. (I hope my husband doesn't read this) and two, I have a lisp.

During the interview Kat comments on my novel including the research of West Point. I'm still thinking of the last topic we were talking about and contemplating my giggle through that answer, Fort Laramie. West Point in is in New York. Fort Laramie is in Kansas. Kat begins to tell me how she lives near West Point and starts talking about how beautiful the river is, but I'm thinking Kansas. My mind goes blank. I search my brain for research knowledge on the Kansas territory. Where the hell is a beautiful river in that part of the country? I think I stuttered, stammered and finally just...giggled.

Thank God I didn't speak.

Then came time for me to read. I read the excerpt from chapter three and began to blush as I'm reading on air about sex, wants, desires. Well, at least I didn't giggle, but I did lisp.

Damn it! When did I start doing that? Here I'm trying to entice people to find my characters provocative so much so they whip out their credit card and buy my book and I sound like Cindy Brady.

All in all I think my first interview turned out fine. In between each laugh I had a piece of historical information and a polite, (even if I don't remember it) response. It's archived so I can always go back and listen to it. And giggle.

I can be at least thankful that I didn't sneeze.